Trust: given or earned?

All men are created in the image of God, and so I think it would make sense to simply respect everyone.

Even those who are disrespectful should be thought of as respect worthy.

Certainly, you will generally not solve the problem through now disrespecting them.

@philokalia said
Even those who are disrespectful should be thought of as respect worthy.

As a matter of interest, how much dreary, disrespectful browbeating do you think is the appropriate amount for you to dish out to people in order to try to make them post in a way you deem is respectful?

@FMF

too subtle

@philokalia said
All men are created in the image of God, and so I think it would make sense to simply respect everyone.

Even those who are disrespectful should be thought of as respect worthy.

Certainly, you will generally not solve the problem through now disrespecting them.

i thought about equating trust with respect
but
there's too much difference between the two

@fmf said
As a matter of interest, how much dreary, disrespectful browbeating do you think is the appropriate amount for you to dish out to people in order to try to make them post in a way you deem is respectful?

I think it is good to criticize adults.

If someone is being rude, it makes sense to tell them that they are being rude.

@rookie54 said
i thought about equating trust with respect
but
there's too much difference between the two

Right!

I also think there are different ways we trust people.

I know some great guys who are also good workers, but I would not trust them with my dog sitting.

@rookie54 said
@FMF

too subtle

In his frequent highly personalized efforts to make me "thought of as respect-worthy", he has claimed that I was "never socialized properly", that I have some "literal cognitive disorder", that my personal beliefs are "worthless, schoolboy trash", that I am "spineless and cowardly", and so on and so forth, ad nauseam, despite the fact I have never said anything remotely as disrespectful as that to him or to anyone else here ~ aside from the word "cowardly", which I may have used a few times.

I am just curious about how and why he fashions himself as a poster we can all trust to lecture me or anybody on "respect"?

Yes, perhaps I am being too subtle.

@philokalia said
If someone is being rude, it makes sense to tell them that they are being rude.

But we know what kind of forum you wish this to be by looking at the kind of posters you endorse and encourage, none of whom you accuse of being "rude".

@divegeester said
When I meet people I tend to not trust them until such time as they earn it. This doesn’t mean that I treat them poorly, I just don’t give them the key to my house until I understand their character.

Some observers may think this is a poor way to approach early relationships but I disagree. I find that if I trust a person before I know them, and they then betray that ...[text shortened]... ually blossomed.

So I say don’t trust people until you know them sufficiently.

What say you?

I think trusting new people or restoring trust in people who have let you down in some serious way is a process during which the degree of trust deepens or extends or pertains to increasingly precious or vulnerable areas of one's life.

I don't think it is something one can switch on without such a process although there may well be a specific moment in time when you decide to trust someone.

@fmf said
In his frequent highly personalized efforts to make me "thought of as respect-worthy", he has claimed that I was "never socialized properly", that I have some "literal cognitive disorder", that my personal beliefs are "worthless, schoolboy trash", that I am "spineless and cowardly", and so on and so forth, ad nauseam, despite the fact I have never said anything remotely as disres ...[text shortened]... ster we can all trust to lecture me or anybody on "respect"?

Yes, perhaps I am being too subtle.

LOL, have you literally documented the barbs I've exchanged with you over these years?

Do you have some file running on me?

Or do you just take copious mental notes of all o the things people have ever said that pertain to you?

@fmf said
But we know what kind of forum you wish this to be by looking at the kind of posters you endorse and encourage, none of whom you accuse of being "rude".

Oh no, we have to be honest -- Romans was a very rude guy.

But it was entertaining and fun while it lasted.

A base pleasure. Something I've been guilty of.

@philokalia said
LOL, have you literally documented the barbs I've exchanged with you over these years?

No, I just recall some of them.

@philokalia said
Oh no, we have to be honest -- Romans was a very rude guy. But it was entertaining and fun while it lasted. A base pleasure. Something I've been guilty of.

Perhaps you are a hypocrite then.

@philokalia said
I think it is good to criticize adults.

So the kind of forum you wish this to be is pretty clear from your recent singling out of abusive drunks like Eladar, chaney3, caesar salad and KingDavid403 as "great posters". And here you are pontificating about "respect" and "rudeness" in this community. It's a bit rich.

@divegeester said
When I meet people I tend to not trust them until such time as they earn it. This doesn’t mean that I treat them poorly, I just don’t give them the key to my house until I understand their character.

Some observers may think this is a poor way to approach early relationships but I disagree. I find that if I trust a person before I know them, and they then betray that ...[text shortened]... ually blossomed.

So I say don’t trust people until you know them sufficiently.

What say you?

Trust has to be earned, it's part of the way that we distinguish our friends from our acquaintances, and actually it works both ways. I'd think it a bit weird if someone I'd just met gave me their house keys and said 'Could you feed my cat' or whatever. I wouldn't steal from the person, but they don't know that. (And I'd feed the cat)
I believe we concur on this point, and it's got nothing to do with the bible or being a Christian. I daresay there are some Satanists around who are more trustworthy than some of the Christians I know.