Jokes

The only thing flat earthers fear

is Sphere itself.

A drunk Israeli was driving at speed and hit 2 Palestinian pedestrians in the west bank, knocking one at least 100 meters through the air, and the other went through the windscreen, ending up in the passenger seat.
The Israeli police questioned the driver and then arrested the Palestinians. One for break and enter and the other for leaving the seen of an accident.

Listen,The amount of booze I consume is nothing compared to the amount of booze I dont drink......perspective

Spartacus said nothing when the lion ate his wife.

He was gladiator.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
Spartacus said nothing when the lion ate his wife.

He was gladiator.

A friend asked "As a little boy - was your mum super strict with you?"

I answered "No. My mum was never a little boy."

@david-burton said
sometimes I use big words I dont understand so I can sound more photosynthesis.

@moonbus said
You do realize that you almost renunciated yourself there?

i once drove a coach for the luna company

it was a moonbus

@david-burton said
sometimes I use big words I dont understand so I can sound more photosynthesis.

YouTube

@moonbus said
You do realize that you almost renunciated yourself there?

Why did the mechanic sleep under the car?

He wanted to wake up oily in the morning.

Husband to wife "what the hell are all them broken condoms doing in the lounge"

Wife replies "watching the tv George and can you please refer to our children by name".

I told my Psychiatrist thae I was hearing voices,

He told me I didnt have a Psychiatrist.

@orangutan said
I read that three times before I realised what was going on.
In my defence - at my age most people lose about 20% of their sight.

Sigh.