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Treat Everyone Equal

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Joined
04 Oct 06
Moves
600274
04 Nov 19

@whodey said
Boy the weather turned cold in a hurry!

Why it's so cold politicians have their hands in their own pockets for a change.
Old, but the best of late! 😉

-VR

Child of the Novelty

San Antonio, Texas

Joined
08 Mar 04
Moves
618655
04 Nov 19

" I cannot tell a lie " George Washington
" I cannot tell the truth " Donald Trump
" I cannot tell the difference " Republicans

Illumination

The Razor's Edge

Joined
08 Sep 08
Moves
19665
05 Nov 19

At the grocery, a woman was sorting through turkeys in the freezer case.

"Do those get any bigger?" she asked the stock boy.

"No," he replied, "They're dead."

free tazer tickles..

wildly content...

Joined
09 Mar 08
Moves
201232
05 Nov 19

this thought is carved in stone

you have no idea how hard it was to shove it thru the internets

Quiz Master

RHP Arms

Joined
09 Jun 07
Moves
48793
06 Nov 19

@very-rusty said
Maybe it some cycle the moon and earth are going through we haven't even learned about yet.

-VR
Yes the relative movement of moon and Earth is a complete mystery. 😵

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
06 Nov 19
1 edit

I got pulled over the other day for Quid Pro Quo. I told the police officer I knew what a minajatawa was, and told him if it was anything like that I was not interested because he simply did not have the legs for it. He then glared at me and handed me a ticket.

After writing me a ticket as he started to walk away I noticed a Hillary bumper sticker on his police car. I then shouted out the window, "Now I know what perjury is, people are SUPPOSE to go to jail for that ya know cuz it's a felony!!"

Come to find out, he had no sense of humor. Any money you send will be of help.

Treat Everyone Equal

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Joined
04 Oct 06
Moves
600274
06 Nov 19

@wolfgang59 said
Yes the relative movement of moon and Earth is a complete mystery. 😵
Actually your sarcasm shows through loud and clear....I believe there are things we still don't know. You can believe as you wish! 😉 😛

-VR

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
06 Nov 19

@wolfgang59 said
Yes the relative movement of moon and Earth is a complete mystery. 😵
Indeed.

Gravity.

You can't see it, can't measure it, but science insists it exists.

Treat Everyone Equal

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Joined
04 Oct 06
Moves
600274
06 Nov 19

@whodey said
Indeed.

Gravity.

You can't see it, can't measure it, but science insists it exists.
Question still remains do they know it all?........Not so long ago they thought the earth was flat. 😉

-VR

The Ghost Chamber

Joined
14 Mar 15
Moves
28744
07 Nov 19

What does old Rusty and a hockey player have In common?

Neither have their own teeth.

Treat Everyone Equal

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Joined
04 Oct 06
Moves
600274
07 Nov 19

@ghost-of-a-duke said
What does old Rusty and a hockey player have In common?

Neither have their own teeth.
Says the man who has two pair of false teeth and never played a hockey game in his life!!! 😛

Mr-Know-it-all, turns out to know nothing at all!!! 😉

-VR

The Ghost Chamber

Joined
14 Mar 15
Moves
28744
07 Nov 19

In Rusty's defence, he and other Senior citizens have taken to texting with gusto. They even have their own vocabulary:

BFF: Best Friend Fainted
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered by Medicare
FWB: Friend with Beta-blockers
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low

Treat Everyone Equal

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Joined
04 Oct 06
Moves
600274
07 Nov 19
3 edits

@ghost-of-a-duke said
In Rusty's defence, he and other Senior citizens have taken to texting with gusto. They even have their own vocabulary:

BFF: Best Friend Fainted
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered by Medicare
FWB: Friend with Beta-blockers
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
I'll smile when you get funny! 😛

Now you are on the Senior attack, that will win you a lot of friends goad! 😉 😛

FYI: Goalies wear face masks so have very little chance of anything happening to their teeth....If only you paid attention to what is being said instead the drum of the sound of your own senseless words! 😉

-VR

Joined
06 Nov 15
Moves
41301
07 Nov 19

@ghost-of-a-duke said
In Rusty's defence, he and other Senior citizens have taken to texting with gusto. They even have their own vocabulary:

BFF: Best Friend Fainted
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered by Medicare
FWB: Friend with Beta-blockers
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
One might also add:

LOL - Lisping Out Loud
LMFAO - Licking My Food Against Oragel

Treat Everyone Equal

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Joined
04 Oct 06
Moves
600274
07 Nov 19

@wolfe63 said
One might also add:

LOL - Lisping Out Loud
LMFAO - Licking My Food Against Oragel
wolfy....Just when I thought you couldn't get more lame, you surprise me!!! 😛

-VR