Jokes

Jokes

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p

Joined
27 Dec 05
Moves
143878
27 Feb 14

What do you call a Spaniard that has had his car stolen ?...Carlos
Spanish archer .....El bow

R
Standard memberRemoved

Joined
26 Feb 14
Moves
1339
27 Feb 14

Originally posted by phil3000
What do you call a Spaniard that has had his car stolen ?...Carlos
Spanish archer .....El bow
how can you tell when an American has been in your back yard........the trash cans empty and the cats pregnant.

Joined
14 Mar 04
Moves
178609
27 Feb 14

Originally posted by redbarons
how can you tell when an American has been in your back yard........the trash cans empty and the cats pregnant.
How do you seperate Greek men from Greek boys?...with a crowbar.

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27 Feb 14

Misfit Queen

Isle of Misfit Toys

Joined
08 Aug 03
Moves
36853
27 Feb 14

The post that was quoted here has been removed
Shut up, Vince.

It was stupid then, it's even more stupid now.

Yes, a year later, it's still stupid.

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27 Feb 14

Originally posted by Suzianne
Shut up, Vince.

It was stupid then, it's even more stupid now.

Yes, a year later, it's still stupid.
vince who the f is vince

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27 Feb 14

chemist

Linkenheim

Joined
22 Apr 05
Moves
658466
28 Feb 14

Originally posted by redbarons
vince who the f is vince
Best joke in this thread.

***THREAD CLOSED ***

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28 Feb 14

2 lengths of string enter a bar 1 orders a beer,the barman says are u a length of string the string replies yes,the barman say sorry mate we don't sell beer to lengths of string,the 2nd length starts contorting and twisting, then asks for a beer,the barman looks at him and says are you a length of string and he replies im a fraid not.

b

Joined
06 Dec 10
Moves
47203
01 Mar 14

The current banking crisis explained by an Irishman Young Paddy bought a donkey from a farmer for £100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.

The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry son, but I have some bad news. The donkey's died.'

Paddy replied, 'Well then just give me my money back.'

The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I've already spent it.'

Paddy said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'

The farmer asked, 'What are you going to do with him?'

Paddy said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'

The farmer said, 'You can't raffle a dead donkey!'

Paddy said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'

A month later, the farmer met up with Paddy and asked, 'What happened with that dead donkey?'

Paddy said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at £2 each and made a profit of £898'

The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'

Paddy said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his £2 back.'

Paddy now works for the Royal Bank of Scotland .

p

Joined
27 Dec 05
Moves
143878
01 Mar 14

Scottish cloakroom attendant ... Angus Mc oatup
Two Irish gays ...Patrik fitsgerrald and Gerald Fitspatrick .
Irish window fitter ...Paddy O,Doors

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01 Mar 14

Originally posted by Suzianne
Shut up, Vince.

It was stupid then, it's even more stupid now.

Yes, a year later, it's still stupid.
I cant believe that was the offensive post

p

Joined
27 Dec 05
Moves
143878
01 Mar 14

Some bloke knocked on my back door ,when I opened it there was a little chap of about 3 feet 3inches standing there . I said "who are you "? he said "I am the metre man " 😕

Joined
29 Dec 08
Moves
6788
01 Mar 14

Originally posted by phil3000
Some bloke knocked on my back door ,when I opened it there was a little chap of about 3 feet 3inches standing there . I said "who are you "? he said "I am the metre man " 😕
A female officer of that stature ticketed my car the other day. She was lovely.

p

Joined
27 Dec 05
Moves
143878
02 Mar 14

I went to the doctors the other day and asked him if he had anything for wind , he gave me a kite 😲😲😲😲😲