Jokes

Definition of the word Tradition...
Peer pressure from dead people...

Mike asks his doctor what he can do, as he suspects his wife is hard of hearing, maybe even stone deaf.
"Stand about fifteen meters away from her, and ask her what is for dinner. If you get no response, stand closer, about ten meters, and ask her again what is for dinner. If still no answer, go closer even, and ask again. If still no answer, go stand right next to her and ask."
Sure thing, he does that, and when he got right next to her, she answers," My goodness, Mike, for the fifth time, Chicken!"

Doctor: Do you watch your husband's face during sex?
Lady: I did once, and he looked very angry.
Doctor: Why?
Lady: Must be because he was watching from the window.

Me: When I donate blood, I do not extract it myself.
A nurse does it for me.
Receptionist: Yes, but this is a sperm bank and it doesn't work that way.

My dad signed me up for organ donation.
He's a man after my own heart.

@pawnpaw
Husband: I'd like you to tell me when you are climaxing.
Wife: OK, but the phone might not be in reach.

I was in the emergency room when a male student nurse pulled back the curtain to ask a female patient routine medical questions:

Student Nurse: "Have you ever had a hysterectomy?"

Patient: "Yes"

Student Nurse: "When?"

Patient: "In 2011"

Student Nurse: "Do you think that you could be pregnant?"

Patient: "Are you sure that this is the right career for you?"

Army instructor to cadet: " I DIDN'T SEE YOU AT CAMOUFLAGE PRACTICE TODAY!"
Cadet: "Thank you sir..."

We don't listen all that well...
Wife: "I can't find my keys!"
Hubby: "It's in your jeans."
Wife: " Don't you drag my family into this!"

ok

@FMF
ok

@sonhouse
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@Ponderable

ok