Breathing & Music

@divegeester said
Read the thread and stop deflecting. You made yourself look foolish. Punto.

You seem to be on a recent mission to make yourself look foolish.

It's working.

@divegeester said
Read the thread and stop deflecting. You made yourself look foolish. Punto.

You know, I get the impression, by the tone of combative belligerence you and FMF use in these threads, that you must have been bullied as children, and now, without substance, you make negative insinuations to augment your lack of self esteem.

Please just tell me how you think I "went about justifying" that made me look foolish. If you can.

@secondson said
You know, I get the impression, by the tone of combative belligerence you and FMF use in these threads, that you must have been bullied as children, and now, without substance, you make negative insinuations to augment your lack of self esteem.

Please just tell me how you think I "went about justifying" that made me look foolish. If you can.

Never-mind the pseudo-Freudian deflections; did you look back over the thread?

@ghost-of-a-duke said
You seem to be on a recent mission to make yourself look foolish.
It's working.

What’s up, Very Rusty not logged on yet?

@divegeester said
Never-mind the pseudo-Freudian deflections; did you look back over the thread?

There's no incentive.

@secondson said
What a fool you made of yourself last time this quote was discussed.

I don't think that's true. You should take a look again.

@petewxyz said
This is a fantastic question which I do not believe is answered well by mental health literature from the perspective of the health goals of adults.

I think the related issue is whether or not human beings need an outlet. Would it be healthier to achieve a serene state of calm and even breathing at all times or do we need to take ourselves into states of heightened arousa ...[text shortened]... io by your developmental needs and that is the child or young person's part of the attachment dance.

I found it particularly interesting when you brought up the idea that childhood is rehearsal for adulthood and thus scenarios of learning how to deal with irritation and learning self-regulation is vital.

My fiancee was raised in a large family, and I find that she is thus hypersocial and adapts extremely well to groups immediately, and this seems to have been a sort of pattern for people raised in larger families. There is a certain gregariousness and willingness to mingle & even suffer through boring talk that I can see from them.

It is almost as if they just rehearsed more & better because they were always navigating social situations that were both pleasant & unpleasant.

@rookie54 said
a drum circle composed of adepts and rookies
the beat will not be even and well composed, and the off-balance vibrations will enhance mindfulness

unless of course yer annoyed by it and then one must begin again

There was a park in the city I drank in in my youth where, at around 1 or 2 AM, a hippie drum circle would often come -- they would literally just sit in a circle drumming together, changing the beat sometimes at some cue as the 'feel' seemed to change, and people would go into the center and dance (often joined by the drummers).

It was particularly funny in the sense that people would always join them, being in a good mood & usually drunk.

You could also see how simple, repetitive beats could morph... and how they could get you in a sort of trance, and there certainly was a spiritual element to it.

@philokalia said
There was a park in the city I drank in in my youth where, at around 1 or 2 AM, a hippie drum circle would often come -- they would literally just sit in a circle drumming together, changing the beat sometimes at some cue as the 'feel' seemed to change, and people would go into the center and dance (often joined by the drummers).

It was particularly funny in the sense ...[text shortened]... . and how they could get you in a sort of trance, and there certainly was a spiritual element to it.

you and i have met

My second mini-paragraph there was incomplete -- I meant to talk about how people from all walks of life came...

Really, you would see club people, metal people, hip hop people; middle aged guys who were at the Yuppie bar...

It was really a crossroads.

I almost now want to go back & see if those guys come out still.

@philokalia said
My fiancee was raised in a large family

On an aside, I really do think it’s time you married this poor girl. It seems like she’s been waiting for you for years. In fact I think it’s three years.

@philokalia said
I found it particularly interesting when you brought up the idea that childhood is rehearsal for adulthood and thus scenarios of learning how to deal with irritation and learning self-regulation is vital.

Definitely and of course. I’m not aligned with your thinking on music significantly impacting this process though.

Music is certainly a wonderful thing, but so is corn, and clouds and rivers and the single called organism. Because of how music affects our emotions in the moment we are listening to it, I think we can have a tendency to attribute and overstate it’s influence in other areas of cognitive process and development.

In the example of your OP I feel that the musical interludes you experiences as part of your mood relationship with your mother where a symptom of the dynamic of the relationship transition rather than the cause of it.

On the other hand music can support bonding in friendship for sure. Jimmy Page once said something about how Led Zeppelin music is something shared between friends.

@philokalia said
I found it particularly interesting when you brought up the idea that childhood is rehearsal for adulthood and thus scenarios of learning how to deal with irritation and learning self-regulation is vital.

My fiancee was raised in a large family, and I find that she is thus hypersocial and adapts extremely well to groups immediately, and this seems to have been a sort o ...[text shortened]... tter[/i] because they were always navigating social situations that were both pleasant & unpleasant.

I am a big believer in the idea that it is important to identify the places where you will thrive by understanding and seeking the settings that match what you were rehearsing for. It's not about trying to be 'normal' it's about identifying where your journey would naturally take you. I remember thinking that a medical school was like a giant sorting house as people were matched to the disciplines that were a good fit with their journey. I thought the people who found things the hardest were determined to force their square peg into a round hole due to ideals about who they ought to be as opposed to reflection on their journey.

I do think music connects to the above process very well. Some persuade themselves to listen to what they feel they ought to like before learning what music resonates with their self and when they can feel a connection. It catches me by surprise as I realise I can connect to music I never imagined as right for me. The journey began in early teens where you had to either like soul music and hate rock music or vice versa. It's a long time ago but it felt like a truth!

@petewxyz said
I am a big believer in the idea that it is important to identify the places where you will thrive by understanding and seeking the settings that match what you were rehearsing for. It's not about trying to be 'normal' it's about identifying where your journey would naturally take you. I remember thinking that a medical school was like a giant sorting house as people were mat ...[text shortened]... er like soul music and hate rock music or vice versa. It's a long time ago but it felt like a truth!

I was secretly into Elvis while all my friends were into Nirvana.

@ghost-of-a-duke said
I was secretly into Elvis while all my friends were into Nirvana.

When I was a student we used to go over to a pub with an Elvis Impersonator. I would never have seen that coming when I was a kid but those nights were immense. Basically we just got off our faces and threw ourselves at it, but it was sound stuff. I had a secretary who was an Elvis fan so when she retired we went to an Elvis Impersonator for her as well at the Adelphi in Liverpool. Good memories.

Music creates the opportunity to be disinhibited with people and share a memory. Maybe that is important. I remember being spun round the dance floor one Xmas by the woman who cleaned the clinic where the team was based. That seemed important, a remembered story in the life of the team.