Commemorating the dead, Javanese style.

My father in law died back in December.

That evening he lay in an open coffin and was viewed by hundreds of people including students he'd taught 40-50 years ago.

The next day he was buried in the ancestral cemetery [where my wife and I will be buried one day] in a town 90 minutes' drive to the east of here - where he was born. They rented two coaches to get the funeral-goers over there.

Three days later there was a prayer meeting in his widow's house. They had to borrow the neighbour's garden and put up a tent thing to accommodate all the people who turned up.

Seven days later there was a church service at the church where he served for decades as a deacon - and where, incidentally, I was married and where both of my sons were baptized. A couple of cars full of close family members went to visit the grave later that day.

Forty days later [the day before yesterday] five carloads of family and friends visited his grave and spread rose petals on it and prayed. They also paid their respects to his parents who are buried there too.

Everyone also visited the grave of my father in law's father in law, something which all family visitors always do.

This will be repeated after 100 days, and then after exactly one year, and then after 1,000 days.

And that will be the end of the formal commemoration of his passing.

Three days, seven days, a hundred days, a year, and a thousand days.

As far as I know, all Javanese people observe these traditions, regardless of their religion.

@fmf said
My father in law died back in December.

That evening he lay in an open coffin and was viewed by hundreds of people including students he'd taught 40-50 years ago.

The next day he was buried in the ancestral cemetery [where my wife and I will be buried one day] in a town 90 minutes' drive to the east of here - where he was born. They rented two coaches to get the funeral-g ...[text shortened]... ys.

As far as I know, all Javanese people observe these traditions, regardless of their religion.

My condolences to your family.

And thank you for this small window into your extended family and these traditions of the Javanese people. I found it interesting.

I note that PB1002's attempt to troll me about my father in law dying was removed by the mods

@fmf said
I note that PB1002's attempt to troll me about my father in law dying was removed by the mods

I consider my own Father-in-Law's funeral of a few years back, and I have to say, your lot do it better.

@fmf said
I note that PB1002's attempt to troll me about my father in law dying was removed by the mods

No qualms in saying I reported it.

@fmf said
My father in law died back in December.

That evening he lay in an open coffin and was viewed by hundreds of people including students he'd taught 40-50 years ago.

The next day he was buried in the ancestral cemetery [where my wife and I will be buried one day] in a town 90 minutes' drive to the east of here - where he was born. They rented two coaches to get the funeral-g ...[text shortened]... ys.

As far as I know, all Javanese people observe these traditions, regardless of their religion.

Pretty similar to how its done here. Lots of Hindu rituals and cultural practices. For every observation or date there is a lot of prayers, catering and food. Alcohol is not allowed but the relatives trunk [boot in the UK] is well stocked. As a university student these cultural practices was a godsend to poor students. On the weekend walked around the neighbouring towns looking for these weddings, funerals, etc etc to get something to eat. They welcome everyone..

@rajk999 said
Pretty similar to how its done here. Lots of Hindu rituals and cultural practices.

Yes, I think what I described is influenced by Hinduism.

@fmf said
Yes, I think what I described is influenced by Hinduism.

Would you say this is regional, being relatively close by India, as opposed to being religious? As you say, these traditions are common, regardless of religion. This makes me think it's more of a regional aspect, than a religious aspect.

@suzianne said
Would you say this is regional, being relatively close by India, as opposed to being religious? As you say, these traditions are common, regardless of religion. This makes me think it's more of a regional aspect, than a religious aspect.

Indonesia was Hindu [its own hybrid brand though] for over a thousand years before it became Islamic [about 800 years ago].

@fmf said
Indonesia was Hindu [its own hybrid brand though] for over a thousand years before it became Islamic [about 800 years ago].

Sounds sensible.