this implies my opinions on what is or isnt sin is based upon opposing gods view. which is far from the truth. i base my opinions on what i think is right or wrong, i do not take gods opinion into consideration. there are many things i agree with god, so im not sure why you would choose to word something like that. it adds a whole new meaning that was never there.
I emphasize here what is to me the most important point.
You said honestly that you cannot seem to get on the line (or something like that). You indicate you cannot seem to contact God. God is not real to you.
Theorize, argue, debate, about God you can do for hours. But God is not real to you.
I am telling why. Your sins have made an barrier to personal intinate communion with God.
Now if there were no answer to that problem, that would indeed be unfortunate. But I tell you there is provision made for this problem. It was made before you were born.
The obstacle between you and an intimate and personal communion with God is your sins. Nothing more interesting. Nothing more intriquing.
I recommended being detailed about them in confession. Actually even if you were general it probably would work also. IE. "Lord God I approach you not based upon my merit but trusting in the blood of Christ that you have provided for the cleansing of my sins. Lord Jesus I come to You under the redeeming blood. I know no other stand. I stand before you on the basis of your redeeming work to save me from my sins."
Some people prefer that the barrier remain intack.
Some people want there to be a insulation between them and God.
Some people want the barrier removed.
The blood of Jesus is the way to definitely have the barrier removed.
This can be taken to the bank.
This is trustworthy information.
non of this makes sense to me, you seem to be saying that me disagreeing that some things should be classed as sins is just me making excuses because i enjoy doing it? is this right?
The truth of the matter is that we do not realize to what extent we have transgressed. If we were to see this all at once it might drive us mad.
Some light is given. Some realization is given.
There is no need to hunt for things which you consider questionable and do not want to admit are sins.
You will have enough time to consider the things which you know have been your sins.
lets put this into real terms to help understand each other.
god says - homosexuality is a sin. i say - homosexuality should not be a sin.
do you think i secretly think it is but want to rebel against god? do you think i think it so i can enjoy homosexual activity? how am i 'bribing my conscience'???
I listed the bribing of our conscience as one of a number of things we do to avoid repentance.
Argue your case with God Himself. He never rejects an honest conversation, I think. IF you pour out your heart and tell God how you feel I think this is a start to draw close to God as well.
I have had many many constraversies with God.
I found that an honest talk is good to have with God.
I would recommend that you read the Psalms and see how many times David or one of the other Psalmists poured out their complaint before God. They poured out their hearts before God in honesty.
It is good to realize that no one love you as the Christ Who went to His cross for you that you could be reconciled to God.
He could do this because He was God/man. He was the eternal and the temporal, the Divine and the human. And His death on your behalf can have that kind of both personal and eternal relevance.
IF you do not pour out your heart to God you will never pour out your heart to someone who cares for you MORE, loves you MORE than God.