My story is similar.
When I made this account over 20 years ago I was an active tournament player. I pushed aside my trepidations about the lack of a dress code, the indifferent tournament directors and the annoying kids.
I was going to be one of the best chess players and these costly tournaments would be in my rearview mirror.
That never happened.
Long story short, I'm waiting to be eligible for the seniors tournaments which have a 50+ and 65+ setting.