1. Standard membermchill
    Cryptic
    Behind the scenes
    Joined
    27 Jun '16
    Moves
    3077
    02 Oct '19 13:27
    Sometimes you just have to laugh at it all -

    Q: Why are lawyers forbidden to have sex with their clients?
    A; So the clients don't get billed twice for the same service.

    There were 2 dead bodies in the road, a big rat and a small lawyer,
    so, how can you tell them apart?
    A: There were skid marks in front of the rat where the driver tried
    to stop!

    Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a hooker?
    A: The hooker will stop screwing you when you die.

    Q: What's the definition of 50 dead lawyers at the bottom of a lake?
    A: A good start.

    Q: Why are scientists now using lawyers for lab experiments instead of rats?
    A: They don't run afoul of animal rights groups, and there are some things that even rats won't do!
  2. Gothenburg
    Joined
    11 Mar '16
    Moves
    26710
    03 Oct '19 07:10
    @mchill
    Lawyers really seem to have a bad reputation in USA. 🙂
  3. Joined
    15 Oct '06
    Moves
    10115
    03 Oct '19 19:28
    From "Better Call Saul":

    “What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer? The vacuum cleaner’s dirtbag is on the inside.”

    “What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? An offer you can’t understand.”

    “Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt? Because deep down they’re very good people.”

    “What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 60? Your honor.”

    “What’s the difference between a tick and a lawyer? The tick falls off when you’re dead.”

    “How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? Three. One to go up a ladder, one to shake it and one to sue the ladder company.”

    “What do lawyers and sperm have in common? One in three million have a chance of becoming a human being.”

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